Christmas 2012

My family and I had a very nice Christmas this year as we do every year. I never have a lot of money for gifts, this was a especially hard one financially as I have been off work on disability since August 2011. I think I did very good though my 2 children, grand daughter, and parents were very happy with their gifts.
My children and I opened our gifts to each other and spent family time on Christmas Eve, Wee woke up early and watched my grand daughter open her gifts from Santa on Christmas morning, then we went to my parents house for a family breakfast, gifts, and the most important spending time with family.
Christmas isn't about the gifts, although it does feel good to me to give to others, it is about spending time with family, the decorations, and most important the birth of our Lord and Savior.
My grand daughter was both surprised and disappointed on Christmas morning. She said she didn't think she was getting anything from Santa as she didn't think she had been very good, so all the presents she was very excited about, and she got a lot. She was also disappointed because she expected her grandpa to be sitting on the couch when she woke up, that is the present she wanted the most. My ex told her beginning of November that he would for sure be there, he told me on December 14th he would be there for sure I told her to expect him she was so excited she did the happy dance. Then the very next day less than 12 hours later he said he couldn't come something to do with his parents. Which is always the reason he breaks promises to her. I knew better than to tell he was coming that something would come up but he sounded so sincere this time so I made the mistake and told her I will never do that again, But it turned out good she got over it quickly and we all had a great 2 days.
I did not do very well with the decorating this year as I hurt very badly and most of my outside decorations are old and do not look very good anymore. I went shopping for Christmas items yesterday the day after Christmas is always a good day to get at least 50% off of holiday decorations so next year my front porch will be awesome. I always have a great looking tree a mix of store bought ornaments and ones my children and grand daughter have made. I love seeing the handmade things and wouldn't trade them for all the fancy ornaments in the world.
Right after the 1st of the year I will be taking the ornaments off the tree and taking the tree down if I had my way I would leave it up all year I just love it but my little house just does not have the room for it to stay up long. I will be a little sad taking it down but it must be done.
Well I hope everyone had a great Christmas and has a Happy New year!
God Bless!

Christmas and RSD

Well the Christmas season is upon us I love the lights and decorations people have out. I have my tree up and a little village on my marble table, I made a quick centerpiece for my kitchen table I out gold ornaments and a small strand of white lights in a clear glass jar surrounded the front in gold ornaments on one side I have white point settias it took me all of 5 minutes to make up. I just wanted some decorations in the kitchen.
I have my Christmas shopping done I usually buy things a little at a time all year long I do a layaway sometime in the summer and again in October I know what my grown children and grand daughter like. Then I wait till the last minute to buy gift cards for the stockings and for my parents because I would hate to lose them. I have 1 gift card left to buy.
I was really lucky this year I signed up for the Salvation Army Toys for Tots I needed a little help this year. We received a small box of food and a voucher to use to get a turkey or a ham. I appreciate it very much. Last Wednesday my grand daughter got chose to go to with our local shop with a cop program I was so excited as was she. She has always been afraid of policemen I think because of her grandpa (my ex) being arrested several times in front of her,  but now she has a better attitude towards them. They met at the police station rode a public transportation bus to Wal Mart got to shop with the police officer assigned to her with a $100.00 and then they had a pizza party I am so grateful to  a lot of sponsors of this program for this. She had a real good time.
I have had a bad week with my RSD I have had 3 flare ups which is the most in a week I have had. It is so painful and no amount of pain medicine, moving around, laying down, or heating pad makes it better.  I have had a lot of stress lately which causes a flare up, I have not been sleeping very well, and the weather here in Michigan is getting colder, all of these things make the RSD worse.
I am hoping my next visit to the pain Dr she gives me more pain meds and ups the MG on my Neurotin. Hopefully these things will at least take the edge off.
This disease is something I will have for the rest of my life there is no cure and it will only get worse. It has traveled to other parts of my body in a very short period of time.
It is very depressing not to be able to take a walk, get on the floor, or do simple things like vacuuming, or laundry. My fingers have been aching more I 3 times this week dropped things a cup of  coffee, pudding and water theses things we not heavy but my hands just couldn't handle them.

Well I hope everyone has a wonderful holiday!
God bless!
 

Weather Changes and RSD

T am having more trouble with pain and tingling I was wondering if the cold weather we are having here in the great state of Michigan had anything to do with it-so I went on the internet and came across  this article I though tI would share with everyone. Weather does play a big part in the way RSD acts  up.

I really want to move to Florida or Tennessee where the weather is warmer so I don't hurt so much, but right now that isn't a possibility so I do what I can to minimize it as much as possible.

 CRPS - Weather changes, do they affect CRPS? RSD?

DOES THE WEATHER AFFECT CRPS? 

Now that the winter season is upon us, for most of the country anyway, many patients are seeing changes in their pain although quite a few may not have ever made the connection. In talking to patients I often run into some who do not know that the changes in the seasons cause changes in their pain. They might have noticed that they get colder in the winter, that storms bother them, etc. but did not understand that there is the direct connection.

Barometric changes, especially drops in the BP, can cause increased pain for many patients. These can come from violent storms such as hurricanes and thunderstorms but they can also come with snowstorms and changes in the highs and lows you hear the weatherman describing all the time. 

When you watch the weather next time, pay particular attention to when the next Low Pressure system is moving in and monitor your pain. See if you notice any changes/increases in your pain. Chances are that you will.

The other issue that CRPS patients face in the winter months, especially those who live in the colder, wintry states, is dealing with the extra pain that comes with the extreme cold. 

One of the ways that CRPS patients suffer pain, (and I realize this is oversimplifying things) is from constricted blood vessels. These constricted blood vessels not only cause pain but also restrict blood flow thereby lowering the temperature of the extremities.  When the temperature drops these blood vessels constrict further, increasing the pain and lowering the temperature even further. 

The patient ends up in more pain and an inability to get their feet/hands warm. 

So what do you do, to decrease the pain and effects of the winter?

Well, you could do what I did, move south! It is nearly Christmas and it is 70+ degrees here. But that isn't practical for most people so you need other solutions.

- Layered clothing helps, and definitely you need to keep your hands and feet and head covered as much as possible. 

- If you have access to a warm water pool (85 degrees of more) that is EXTREMELY helpful, not only for raising the temperature in your extremities but also for keeping the chronic pain patient's body in shape and lowering their overall pain level. 

- Soaking in warm water with Epsom Salts is very beneficial. You don't need fancy bath salts/oils but by using epsom salts your body absorbs the magnesium, which helps in restoring normal blood flow. 

- Using microwave moist-heating pads (the kind with beads inside) helps as well. 

What ideas have you tried that have helped? Share them here in the comments!

 

Hope this helped.

Have a great day everyone!

 

 

RSD Symptoms

These are some of the symptoms of RSD this terrible chronic pain disorder that people can not see- It is invisible no one knows what we with RSD go through everyday. We look like normal people with no problems, but we have some kind of pain all day every day. I do not have all these symptoms but I do have a lot of them, it is hard for me to do everyday tasks even sometimes it is hard to put socks on. My feet and legs get very cold, my ankles swell, I have muscle spasms in my legs and feet, muscle ticks, and chronic pain all day everyday in my feet, legs, lower back and now my fingers are being affected. I have chronic fatigue, and arthritis, I walk with a cane and use a wheelchair if I want to do anything that requires walking more than a few feet.  It is sometimes hard for me to hold onto things as simple as a full coffee cup. I deal with this everyday I have no choice it is what it is, Thank Goodness my daughter lives with me who does most of the driving, and things around the house I can not do I really cherish her.
Don't berate people for being on disability, parking in a handicapped parking spot, or not working you do not know what they are going through or what their capabilities are. 
Thank you to the people who open doors for me at a store I really appreciate it.

SYMPTOMS: Not all patients have exactly the same symptoms but the most common are: severe sensitivity to touch and temperatures, swelling, muscle spasms, myoclonic jerks, sweating, muscle ticks, inflammation, anxiety, depression, trouble concentrating, irritability, bone loss, skin lesions (rare), immune system problems, with the most prominent symptom being chronic pain. The pain has been described as burning, shooting, stabbing and aching. Some report bizarre feelings of cold water being splashed on the affected area, goose bump, and distonia (difficulty initiating movement). Over time symptoms can change, become worse or better and sometimes spread to other areas apart from the original injury. Pain has the tendency to become less severe the longer the RSD/CRPS is present.

Other symptoms of RSD/CRPS, not always mentioned, caused by the malfunction of the sympathetic nervous system: allergies/asthma, absence or abnormal menstrual cycle, chest pain, cardiac complica

absence or abnormal menstrual cycle, chest pain, cardiac complications, chronic fatigue, autoimmune disorders such as arthritis and Crohn's disease, IBS ( digestive problems-acid reflux, constipation ), fibromyalgia/myofacial syndrome, hypertension, Raynauds disease, increased sensitivity to external stimuli ( sight, sound, smell ), insomnia, memory loss, migraine headaches, mood swings/anxiety, tremors, visual disturbances.

Thank you for reading and God Bless!

 

Cottage in the Oaks Giveaway!

We will keep this giveaway open until Friday, November 16 at 11:00 pm EST. This giveaway is open to the lower 48 US residents only and here’s how you can enter:

Mandatory:  1. Follow Cottage in the Oaks and comment that you do.

More options for more entries {these are optional}:

2.  Follow Cottage in the Oaks on twitter here. Leave a comment that you do.

3. Like Cottage in the Oaks Facebook page here. Leave a comment that you did.

4. Blog about the giveaway and comment with the link.

5. Tweet about the giveaway and comment with the link.

WOW!  5 ways to enter!!!! This is a gorgeous set……I know you guys will love it!

Best Wishes…..can’t wait to send this out to someone!

Blessings~

This is a awesome  giveaway I wanted to let all my reader to know about it to go and enter it, wouldn't this look fantastic in your shower?

Domestic Violence Month

Just a reminder that October is Domestic Violence Awareness month I have been reading posts and updates on the subject and it is really very sad. Women as young as 15 are victims of this terrible thing, I can not figure out how we fall prey to domestic violence. How are we attracted to these type of men? I read they are so nice and polite at first after you move in with them or after marriage it starts almost right away. They want to control your every move. It just isn't right.
Every 9 seconds in the US a woman is assaulted or beaten.
Everyday in the US three women are murdered by their boyfriend or husband.
Remember if you are in a abusive relationship weather it is a physical, emotional, mental or verbal relationship keep all the recordings, emails, text messages whatever you can from the abuser so that when it comes to court you have evidence of the abuse. It is a sad fact that although relatively easy to get a restraining order, in court judges want proof of abuse it is a he said she said thing and in order for thing sot get better you need that.
Children can be very big victims. If they are not being directly abused they see and hear abuse their mother is going through. It can be a very devastating thing.  Boys exposed to physical abuse, sexual abuse, and adult domestic violence are 4 times more like to perpetuate domestic violence as adults.
My children witnessed  the verbal abuse I went through and it just isn't right. They are so innocent, and can grow up to be a abuser also. Thank God both of my children, now adults know that it isn't right. My son will not be a abuser and my daughter will not be a victim thanks to their good sense.
I know a lot of woman think there is no way out. They say to themselves I have no job, I have no place to go, But are shelters you can go and people willing to help you. There are people willing to give you a job. It is better to get you and the children out of the violent situation than to think of those things and stay. Most times the violence only gets worse.
 Many victims of domestic violence face homelessness when trying to escape the abuse they are experiencing. According to the U.S. Conference of Mayors, 28% of families were homeless because of domestic violence in 2008, and 39% of cities in 2007 cited domestic violence as the primary cause of family homelessness.
Please women get out, before it gets worse. 
Please speak up against domestic violence once you save yourself and your children you may be able to save someone else.
God Bless All!

Most Males are Jerks

I have come to believe that there isn't a nice guy out there. My daughter was really excited recently, I haven't seen her happy in a long time, her old friend she hasn't seen in 5 years came to Michigan to see her. He took us all out to eat and the zoo one day and has been by the house to visit twice. He told us how great the state he lives in was and was really hoping we would move out there to be close to him, he would help us get a place and move. We were all really excited, we hate living in Michigan where it gets cold. With my hips warmer weather would be great.
This person was hoping to be more than friends with my daughter which I originally thought was awesome. He has a nice place to live, owns his own business, does pretty good for himself and he actually liked my daughter.
we told him that the soonest we could move was December 27th as I had a previous obligation I could not break. He was good with that would give us time to pack and for him to find us a place.
He is leaving Michigan tomorrow (friday 10/12/12) back to his home state he came by the house last night told my daughter that he was going to travel around a few states until Christmas and he wanted her to come with him. She said I don't see how I can I have Makayla(her Daughter) she is in school. He said well leave her with your mom and they can both come out in December as planned. She said that will be hard because my mom has a obligation and take take her, and I don't know if I can be away from her for 2 months. He said well I am leaving friday so let me know before then she said ok.
tonight (thursday) she texted him on the phone and said as much as I want to travel with you and can't wait to move near you I really can't move until December 27th as planned. He said well no biggie I got back with my ex girlfriend and we are getting married here soon.
She is devastated to say the least! in ONE day this guy went ot caring about my daughter to saying never mind I am marrying someone else she wants to travel with me and I don't want to wait any longer I am tired of being alone.
What I am wondering about is....why did he say all of this in this in the first place just last night he was talking about her going with him, and today he marrying another girl??????? Just doesn't make sense to either of us. She was so upset he said so and so is a jerk I'm going to bed and did!
I feel so bad for her. Her ex she broke up with around 2 months ago was a real nice guy I really liked him He loved her daughter and she loved him, they were together over 2 years, Then he just stopped coming around, stopped calling, stopped texting. Then we seen on his facebook page a girl displayed a picture of the flowers he had sent her. Needless to say my daughter was very upset. Then my ex the things he did and out me and family through.
 I just don't understand why men are so cruel. Why they think it is ok to treat women so badly and hurt them. I guess I will never know. It is a shame my daughter has to keep going being hurt she is such a sweet girl. She would help you do anything she could, she would give you unconditional love and not as for a lot in return.
Oh well just shows you the way the world is today. terrible!

God Bless!

Domestic Violence

Friends October is Domestic Violence awareness month I have shared a few blog posts about my experiences with domestic violence, mostly verbal abuse thank Goodness  I was never hit, slapped, or beaten up, I was never in a hospital, I never had to hide bruises or make up stories about them when they were discovered by someone like I have heard and read women have. The most physical my ex husband got was he pushed me twice once up against a wall once up against a kitchen counter,But did have my life threatened a couple times, I was never allowed to have a opinion, I was ridiculed, he always wanted things to go his way or he would get mad at me. I had to file a protective order against him once because mainly of his threats. The thing about it is he was such a nice and good man when he was not drinking, When he got drunk is when it started. We are no longer together, which even with all I have been through I still wish we were, I wish he could be the person he is when not drunk all the time, But we don't always get what we wish for.
God has a reason for the things that happens. He wanted us apart maybe he knew it was going to get worse in the abuse and he foresaw it, I don't know I don't like being alone but it isn't the worst thing in the world.
I just want women to understand that if they are abused physically, emotionally, mentally or verbally to leave. I know you think it is impossible, you don't have a job, or money but it possible. call the abuse hotline they will give you the nearest women's shelter to go. Please don't wait it because waiting may make it too late.

God Bless!!!

giveaway and desk redo

I want to share with you a score I got on Craigslist it is a vintage desk I got the person down to 10.00 I wanted it for my grand daughter's room which is black and pink and black with white furniture.
she had a old ugly wood desk that didn't match anything in her room I though about painting it but then thought better of it.

This is the desk after I painted it before the contact paper was put on the top, the top shows the ugly color of the whole desk, I am sorry I thought I took a picture of the desk before I painted it but I guess I didn't

I painted the trim around the top white, the drawers pink with white trim, the knobs black with a dot of pink in the middle I already had the colors of paint I used I didn't have to buy any  just bought this really cute contact paper I found at the Dollar store needed 2 rolls to make it fit, it is white with black flowers I glued it on the top.
This is the finished desk with the chair I reupholstered. 
the desk turned out really nice she loves it and matches her room perfectly!

Here is a fabulous giveaway from a blog that read today go over to her blog and enter. Confessions of a Plate Addict.
 Woo hoo! Are you ready for a fabulous giveaway?  My friend Barb at The Everyday Home has generously offered my readers a $50 spending spree at her amazing online shop...Details! What a wonderfully generous offer! What can you expect to find in her shop? I’ll let Barb tell you…

"Details!"  - a shop featuring a line of Home Decor which was lovingly selected during my travels abroad in Europe, as well as, unique items which have been purchased and are being offered online.  It's all about the "...details!"

So how do you get in on this amazing giveaway? Easy! You can win in five ways:

• Head over to Barb’s shop Details! here and check out all of her wonderful products, then come back and leave a comment telling me what you love best!
• Help spread the word by posting the giveaway button on your sidebar, then come back and leave a comment telling me that you did.
• Blog about the giveaway and leave a comment saying that you did.
• Post the giveaway on Twitter and leave a comment saying that you did.
• Post the giveaway on Facebook and leave a comment saying that you did.

Do just one or all five if you like! The more you do the better your chances to win! Please be sure to leave an email address where I can contact you if you do not have a blog. The giveaway will close September 30th at 5:00 pm Eastern daylight time and the winner will be chosen at random.

Don’t miss this wonderful opportunity to get in on Barb’s generous offer!

The numbers generated by this widget come from RANDOM.ORG's true random number generator. 

 

 

 

Alittle Bit of Alot

I have had a busy couple weeks. I bought carpet tiles for my living room and hallway at my local Habitat Restore. I really like that store for some things. the carpet tiles were bigger than I have seen before, they were 1.75 per tile total for all I bought was 21.50 I thought that was a great deal.

I bought pink spray paint at hte Restore and painted a trash can for my grand daughter's room, We are going to pick out stitckers to put on it from my massive box of scrapbooking stickers.

My ex husband came down last week to visit our grand daughter while he was here he reupolstered my cedar chest. I really like the fabric that was on there looked hand stitched it was the original fabric and the chest is 29 years old, but it was time for it to be redone, it had stains all over it I tried cleaning it, didn't clean,  I put it in the washer that was a bad idea so it is recovered looks very nice though.
He also took the air conditioner out of the living room window and put it in my basement for me(that hting is very heavy needed a dolly) and then he cleaned my window. I really appreciate those things.

I also put a coat of blue paint on the step comming in the side door, it needs another coat. I hung up the 2 sailboat pictures in the entryway. I still need to paint the trim in the entryway. I am very impatient and would love for it to be done Now but with my hip pain I can only do it when they allow me to.
My mother grand daughter and I went to a shoe store 25 minutes from us because they have special shoes extra and triple extra wide. we needed new shoes for school, The woman that helped us measured her feet with her braces on and made sure they fit properly,  Makayla picked out black shoes with pink trim. New Balance They look awesome.

Talking about Ebay I have listed quite a few things which takes alot of time to take the pictures, put them on the computer, load the pictures onto ebay, and  describe all the items. I have also  sold quite a few things on there in the last 2 weeks,  mostly clothes. I have also bought quite a few things clothes for my grand daughter, a book for my son's birthday(which isn't until November) and 2 cross stitches for myself.
I decided to send my grand daughter to a regular public school this year no more blue and white uniforms Yeaaaaaaa. So I needed to buy her some regular clothes. I found a bunch on Ebay that were really cute and half of what I bought still have tags on them. I can't wait to get them.
My mother came by today and had her 2 cute tops and black and pink sparkley skort that Makayla has decided is going to be her first day of school outfit.

I still have quite alot on Ebay I am hoping I need my paypal back up a little for Christmas. But it was nice to have the money in paypal to buy the clothes so I didn't have to spend the cash.
As you can see I have had a busy 2 weeks but I love having accomplished things.
I am hoping not to be gone so long between posts, my hips have been hurting quite alot and it is hard for me to sit.

So until next time God Bless!

Ebay Trials

Well I sold quite a few things on Ebay this week I put all my grand daughters school uniforms on there from last year I had one lady buy 2 pants and 4 skorts. I had another person buy a school skort, and another buy  dress. I was pretty happy, I am saving up my paypal money to buy things for Christmas liek I did last year.
Well today I get a email that the person who bought the 6 uniforms her bank cancelled her payment to me I was very upset. I had a 155.00 diamond ring get lost in the mail, I was so upset I went tothe post office 5 times, called the post office they couldn't find it I insured it and added a trackign number, even with that they couldn't find it. This happened 2 months ago. 
paypal decided to refund the buyers money from my account which I didn't think was fair becase she got her money but I didn't have the ring. Paypal and ebay knew I sent by the trackign number i produced, but they still said screw the seller. Me! Fortunetly a older lady finally received the ring 2 1/2 weeks after I mailed it and sent it back to me. 
So needless to say I am very upset about this situation. I called paypal they basically said your screwed because I didn't add a tracking number this time. Didn't help me with the ring so I figured why bother? 
They say without one they can't prove i sent it. I have a 100% feedback they should know I sent it. 
Ebay won't let me open a case because they got the original transaction that the person paid but it doesn't show that the payment was stopped only paypal has that. I really hope I am not out more money.
I think that ebay needs to find a better system to help protect the seller too. I do not think it is fair that if something happens not the sellers fault that the seller always get penalized.  But it is what it is. Hopefully the account with the buyer will get worked out and they will take the hold off my paypal.
Has anyone else ever had problems with ebay or paypal?
Take care all!

A Amazing Giveaway

This is a giveway I entered to win a 1000.00 gift card to redo a room in my home-I am keeping my fingers crossed- one of the entery options was to blog the giveaway on my blog so here I am- so head on over to ask Anna on facebook it will take you to her blog where she has some amazing pictures of a office/craftroom makeover she did in her home it is awesome.
Tell me about a room in your home that you’d like to make over using the Chip It! Tool and be entered to win a $1,000 Visa gift card and $200 Sherwin-Williams gift card.
And if you’re looking for me, you can find me sitting here dreaming about all the other rooms I can make over in my house using the Chip It! tool (just don’t tell my husband!).
Giveaway Rules:

No duplicate comments.

You may receive (2) total entries by selecting from the following entry methods:

a) Leave a comment in response to the sweepstakes prompt on this post

b) Tweet about this promotion and leave the URL to that tweet in a comment on this post

c) Blog about this promotion and leave the URL to that post in a comment on this post

d) For those with no Twitter or blog, read the official rules to learn about an alternate form of entry.

Entries from all participating blogs will be pooled for winner selection; only two entries per household. This giveaway is open to US Residents age 18 or older. Winners will be selected via random draw, and will be notified by e-mail. You have 72 hours to get back to me, otherwise a new winner will be selected.

The Official Rules are available here.

This sweepstakes runs from 7/23/12-8/10/12

Good luck!

2 Small Projects

Hi everyone- I thought I would share with you 2 small projects I did. After the floors were done I painted the cold air return covers They were white and looked really bad with new floors. I spray painted them brown. Here is a before picture(white) and a after picture (brown) 

As you can see the white trim now to be painted. I will get to that in the next couple weeks. I have a really hard time getting down and up on the floor and can't sit very long once I am down.

I also did another small project today I had a blahh plain white wall so I decided to put up a series of computer generated pictures I had of Jesus with babies and children. They were made a few years ago for me I framed each of them in a black frame. I think they purked up the wall very well.
Not big projects but sprused up the house some.
Sorry for the short length of this blog tonight I am hoping the next one will be longer.
God Bless Everyone and Good Night!

New Floors Woooohoooooo!!

I went to the Habitat Restore in my town to look at laminet hardwood floors I have a small house I wanted to do the living room and hallway. I figured it out it would cost me 232.00 for the flooring, and 60.00 for the paper that goes under the floor. My ex husband would put them in for me,(will post about that in another blog)  so it wouldn't cost me any labor. I talked to my step dad he told me to look under some of the carpet to make sure there was good floor there that I didn't need a sub floor becase that would cost me more.
I left the restore without buying the floor to go home and look at the floor take a picture to send to my step dad. I got home pulled out the couch, wanted to bringthe carpet up in a spot where it wouldn't show, and what to my surprise did I see but beautiful old hardwood floors. I was so excited I was beside myself. I have always wanted to have old original hardwood floors in my house. I texted my ex husband sent him a picture of the floor asked him instead of putting in new floors could he sand and stain these floors? Or at least check them out to see of he could, he said it is alot more time consuming and alot more work but yes he could. I was so excited that I may have original old hardwood floors.
He came down brought 2 sanders, a nice brush and  knee pads to do the job.
He started pulling up carpet and said wow these are original 80 year old oak hardwood floors yes I will sand and stain them.

We went to wal mart bought stain, and sandpaper for his belt sander and he got to work pulling up carpet and padding. It was really disgusting someone who lived in this house previousley did not take care of the carpet there were pee stains all in the back and through the padding. But here are what we discovered when the carpet was pulled up.
Someone was very carless with paint and didn't care what how they treated the beautiful wood floor.

Took him a day and half to sand the living room and hallway but looked good when he was done.  This is after the sanding was done, before the stain.
I chose a stain called Early American was a medium color didnt want them too light or too dark. If I had it to do over I would have gone a little lighter but I still love them.
He worked another day staining the floor, We didn't get the polyurathaine top clear coat when we got the stain he said I will come down again adn finish them with the top coat. well he got to thinking no I htink we need to do it npw to protect them. So at 7:30am on saturday morning we went to Meijer and got the top coat, very expensive I thought(17.00 for a little can) but well worth it. He spent another half day putting on the top coat.
But I am happy to say the floors are done and looking beautiful I love them, and have the floors I have always wanted.

This is my project for the week, Today I had to sweep and mop all the floors, wash all the comforters, dust vaccuum, yesterday I washed walls, clean everything as the dust from sanding went everywhere! I still have some work to do but nothing I can't live with as I do the work little by little.
I am next working on painting the window trim in my entryway greyblue, then painting the 3 steps into my home in the entryway grey blue, it is just too plain. that will be another post.
thanks for stopping god bless!!!

The Good and The Bad

well the last week has has not been very good , a week ago my van started acting up I was told it needs a alternator, the van is old and I am not sure if I want to put any money into it or not. MY daughter has a SSI hearing in August if she gets approved ( keeping ours fingers crossed) we are going to get a good van or suv so we will see, my computer is running real slow and internet keeps going out, and then my clothes dryer doesn't want to heat up. It has been acting up for a couple months, but now I think it is headed for junk yard heaven. I paid $50.00 for it 3 years ago so I can't complain I have certainly got my money out of it, but now I have to go hunting for a new one. (well not new but a good used one)
so it seems as though everythign wants to go out at the same time. I am hoping my laptop lasts me another 6 months I can not afford a new one, but a dryer I have to have.
I have also been havign trouble with the DHS, they cancelled my daughter's case for soem reason she was going to the Michigan works program and receiving medicaid, cash assistance, and food stamps they just close her case with no reaosn given. The thign that really made me upset about it is along with her case being closed my grand daughter also had her Medicaid cut off and i can not afford to get her health insurance on my own.
She has 2 U of M appointments comming up this tuesday and it takes so long to reschedule there I didn't know what I was goign to do, but thankfully her caseworker worked on it and just got it back so no worries there.
I have been paying for health insurance through the Cobra plan at work, which is very expensive but after this month I can no longer afford to pay it. So I am hoping I can get Medicaid for my self. We will see.
I have a work lawyer which is free to me and they are helping me apply for a hearing for disability. They work for the insurance company paying my work disability every month, and all they do is help clients with disabilty they just filed for me to have a hearing. Burns me up because I have worked and paid taxes since I was 16 in my 20's I worked 2 and 3 jobs and I get turned down for disability and have to get  alawyer int he first place. Just doesn't seem fair to me, but I have learned life isn't fair.
I am really struggling financially I don't have a car payment, I cancelled my car insurance as of August 1st I hate it that I won't have a vehicle here but I just can't afford it anymore, I am not paying health insurance after July, I do not have any loans, no credit cards. I just have rent, utilites, and what I call cosmetics (shampoo, body wash, toothpaste, laundry soap etc)  and I just can't make ends meet, but I do ok.
I am also still struggling with lots of pain to where I still don't drive, still don't do much shopping at all, I miss out on things like parades, I  can not see myself going to the fair things like that. I take what I think is lots of pain medicine all day and evening long, I don't sleep much approx. 3 hours a night I have been staying up till 4:30-5am every night.
Soon I am goign to have to buy my grand daughter school clothes she goes to a school that requires a uniform and she has a whole page of school supplies she needs, seems a little much for a 1st grader but what can ya do? I will be shopping online the next couple of days at Sears and Kmart they have a layaway I can pay on the items in installments for the next 6 weeks and make it alot easier fianancially. Think I may go shopping on the net when I am done with thise blog post.
I go to my ortho Dr Monday morning then to the pain Dr monday afternoon. so it will be a busy, hurting day for me.
well going to close it is 3:17am going to internet shop then hopefully to bed at 4:30.
Everyone have a great week!

Happy 4th of July

I am sorry I haven't written anything in awhile but my fingers have been hurting really bad too bad to type a blog.
 I visited another pain Dr here in Monroe wanted a second opinion on a spine stimulator. The new Dr did say I could get one she told me how it usually only controls 50% of people's pain, every person is different may only control 10% of my pain. i watched the dvd they gave me almost all the people that have stimulator that talked on there said they need to take pain meds when there pain becomes bad enough that the stimulator doesn't take care of it,  the internet and a pamphlet I was given said the battery in the stimulator usually last 5 years which if I live 20 more years I will need 4 more surgeries to have the battery replaced, if it loosens or comes out of place I will need surgery to put it back. So I have decided I do not want the stimulator.
It seems too much trouble for me. I am taking pain meds every evening and before I lay down to sleep, today I had to take one when I got up I laid too long, more than my body could handle. I haven't been sleepeing much maybee 2 hours a night and I guess last night I just needed sleep. I hurt every minute of every day.
The insurance company that poays me my diasability insurance from work sent me a letter and a form for my Dr to fill out, it stated that my orth Dr and my 2nd pain Dr didn't put any restrictions on me for working and if they aren't goign to then they aren't goign to pay me. I could hardley believe it. I can hardley walk maybee 5 mins before my legs give out, have to ride a motorized cart when I go shopping which is only maybee twice a month,  have to use a cane 100% of the time I have a walker when both my hips hurt, only sleep 2 hours a night because of pain, I can no longer vaccuum, plant flowers in the yard, go downt he basement to do do laundry and I have no work restrictions? I called noth the Dr's offices one sent me the last office note and it said nothign about work restrictions that I could or couldn't he is the Dr that put me off work so I figure he didn't think he needed to put it one way or another. I am still waiting for the office note from the pain Dr.
Not sure what I will do without that money I can not work, I was getting $92.00 in food stamps they got cut down to $16.00 a month like anyone can eat on that per month. I piut in a application to get mediciad because after this month I can longer to pya my insurance through the Cobra plan its 472.12 a month and I just can't do it anymore, the DHS has to deem me disabled to get it my file has to go before a committee. If they deny me not sure what I will do without insurance can't afford all my Dr's and mediciation. That's another reason for not wanting the stimulator if somethign goes wrong I woil dnever be able to afford to get it fixed.
On a happier note I am goign to Houghton Lake on the 10th for a whole week, boating evening fires with smores and the fresh air. I can not wait a friend is letting us stay at his trailor up there and use his boat so it is a cheap vacation for myself and my grand daughter, just some food and gas. I won't be able to do much but just sitting on the boat going slower than normal will be a treat.
Well I am closing going to my mothers for a 4th of July cook out. everyone have a wonderful day!

Just a little of this and that

Well it is 4:50 in the morning and I have not been to bed yet, I tried laying down but my legs are tingling so bad that I can't lay.
I went to a pain Dr yesterday she agreed with my pain Dr that I have RSD(CRPS) and that a spine stimulator is the best treatment for me. I have to see a pain psychologist to make sure I am not too depressed or have too much going on in my life to have the stimulator. I also have to see a vascular Dr just to rule out vascular disease, which the pain Dr is sure I do not have.
I am having a yard sale this weekend, the ones \I had in then past did not turn out so well but this time I have gotten half the things for sale up from the basement a week ago, I have clothes folded, soemthings priced, Tomorrow the glass, and dishes will be washed and priced. The remaining things in the basement will be brought up so I can clean and price them, I made up signs my daughter is hanging them up on bullentin boards in 4 different stores. I will be making signs from poster board to put on 4 different streets I have a couple more tables than I had last year so things can be arranged better.
I have placed a ad in my local newpaper, announced the sale on facebook, and craigslist. So I think I have covered all my basis I sure hope it goes well. Not only do I need the extra money but with only half the things upstairs the basement sure looks alot better. I want the stuff gone.
My birthday is in 8 days my mom and her best friend are takign me to the casino. I sure hope I come out a winner even if it is just a little, but if not I love getting out of the house I don't very often due to my legs hurting and being weak. I am taking a wheelchair just in case.
I fell over tonight took all my might to catch myself from falling held on to the kitchen table it moved my dog barked with all the noise this is at 3am.
Not sure what today will bring I still have alot to do for the sale with no sleep will be hard but i will get through it.
Everyone have a great week more to come

Some RSD facts

I read a really good article today about RSD I don't like what I read as I have almost everything it spoke about, but it is nice to get a diagnosis finally. I have had pain in my hips for over 20 years I just thought because I worked as a nurse aide most of my life all the lifting, bending, pushing, and pushing was the cause of it. I guess it became really bad after my hip surgery to have my bursa taken out of my right hip, it becomes prevelent after a injury or surgery and your nerve get out wack which is what happened to me.
Here are some facts:
Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy Syndrome (RSD) is also known as Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS). RSD/CRPS is a multi-symptom, multi-system, syndrome usually affecting one or more extremities, but may affect virtually any part of the body. Although it was clearly described 125 years ago by Drs. Mitchell, Moorehouse and Keen, RSD/CRPS remains poorly understood and is often unrecognized.
The best way to describe RSD/CRPS is in terms of an injury to a nerve or soft tissue (e.g. broken bone) that does not follow the normal healing path. The development of RSD/CRPS does not appear to depend on the magnitude of the injury (e.g. a sliver in the finger can trigger the disease). In fact, the injury may be so slight that the patient may not recall ever having received an injury. For reasons we do not understand, the sympathetic nervous system seems
There is no single laboratory test to diagnose RSD/CRPS. Therefore, the physician must assess and document both subjective complaints (medical history) and, if present, objective findings (physical examination), in order to support the diagnosis. There is a natural tendency to rush to the diagnosis of RSD/CRPS with minimal objective findings because early diagnosis is critical. If undiagnosed and untreated, RSD/CRPS can spread to all extremities, making the rehabilitation process a much more difficult one. If diagnosed early, physicians can use mobilization of the affected extremity (physical therapy) and sympathetic nerve blocks to cure or mitigate the disease. If untreated, RSD/CRPS can become extremely expensive due to permanent deformities and chronic pain. There are no studies showing that RSD/CRPS affects the patient's life span. The potential exists for long-term financial consequences. At an advanced state of the illness, patients may have significant psychosocial and psychiatric problems, they may have dependency on narcotics and may be completely incapacitated by the disease. The treatment of patients with advanced RSD is a challenging and time-consuming task.
Diagnosis

If one can demonstrate major nerve damage associated with the development of RSD/CRPS symptoms, the condition is called complex regional pain syndrome (CRPS) type II or causalgia. Generally, causalgia provides more objective evidence of disease due to neurological changes (numbness and weakness).
The terms complex regional pain syndrome (CRPS) type I and type II have been used since 1995, when the International Association for the Study of Pain (IASP) felt the respective names reflex sympathetic dystrophy and causalgia were inadequate to represent the full spectrum of signs and symptoms. ^1-8 The term "Complex" was added to convey the reality that RSD and causalgia express varied signs and symptoms. Many publications, particularly older ones, still use the names RSD and causalgia. To facilitate communication and understanding the designation RSD/CRPS is generally used throughout these practice guidelines. The principles applicable to the diagnosis and management of RSD are similar to those principles applicable to the diagnosis and management of causalgia.

To make the early diagnosis of RSD/CRPS, the practitioner must recognize that some features/manifestations of RSD/CRPS are more characteristic of the syndrome than others, and that the clinical diagnosis is established by piecing each bit of the puzzle together until a clear picture of the disorder emerges. Often the physician needs to rule out other potentially life-threatening disorders that may have clinical features similar to RSD/CRPS, e.g. a blood clot in a leg vein or a breast tumor spreading to lymph glands can cause a swollen, painful extremity. Indeed, RSD/CRPS may be a component part of another disease, (e.g. a herniated disc of the spine, carpal tunnel syndrome of the hand, heart attack). Thus, treating RSD/CRPS will often be directed to treating clinical features rather than a well defined disease. When RSD/CRPS spreads the diagnosis can be more complicated. For example, if it spreads to the opposite limb, it may be more difficult to establish a diagnosis because there is no normal side (control) to compare for objective findings. On the other hand, the spreading of RSD/CRPS symptoms may actually facilitate the diagnosis of RSD/CRPS because spreading symptoms is a characteristic of the disorder.
The diagnosis of RSD/CRPS can be made in the following context. A history of trauma to the affected area associated with pain that is disproportionate to the inciting event plus one or more of the following: I have 95% of these symptoms. I do not have contractions of limbs, I do not have swelling, and my nails do not grow faster quite the opposite.
It is a hard thing to live with. I am 44 years old and I never thought I would be using a walker and cane or be in severe pain 24/7.
I go to a pain Dr on June 11th, for a second opinion on a spine stimulator or a pain pump. I need one implanted the spine stimulator really scares, but I will see what he has to say.
I hope this gives you all some insight into my disorder I will be checking into some fundraisers for the RSD organization.
God Bless you all!!

• Abnormal function of the sympathetic nervous system.
• Swelling.
• Movement disorder.
• Changes in tissue growth (dystrophy and atrophy).

Thus patients do not have to meet all of the clinical manifestations listed above to make the diagnosis of RSD/CRPS. The new CRPS classification system acknowledges this fact by stating that some patients with RSD/CRPS may have a third type of CRPS by categorizing it as "otherwise not specified". There seems to be a small group of patients whose pain following trauma resolves over time, leaving the patient with a movement disorder. The pain and symptoms of RSD/CRPS may exceed both the magnitude and duration of symptoms expected from the normal healing process expected from the inciting event. Similarly, the RSD/CRPS diagnosis is precluded by the existence of known pathology that can be explained by the observed symptoms and degree of pain. There are "grades" of this syndrome described in the literature with symptoms ranging from minor to severe.

Clinical Features of RSD/CRPS

1. Pain – The hallmark of RSD/CRPS is pain and mobility problems out of proportion to those expected from the initial injury. The first and primary complaint occurring in one or more extremities is described as severe, constant, burning and/or deep aching pain. All tactile stimulation of the skin (e.g. wearing clothing, a light breeze) may be perceived as painful (allodynia). Repetitive tactile stimulation (e.g. tapping on the skin) may cause increasing pain with each tap and when the repetitive stimulation stops, there may be a prolonged after-sensation of pain (hyperpathia). There may be diffuse tenderness or point-tender spots in the muscles of the affected region due to small muscle spasms called muscle trigger points (myofascial pain syndrome). There may be spontaneous sharp jabs of pain in the affected region that seem to come from nowhere (paroxysmal dysesthesias and lancinating pains).
   
2. Skin changes - skin may appear shiny (dystrophy-atrophy), dry or scaly. Hair may initially grow coarse and then thin. Nails in the affected extremity may be more brittle, grow faster and then slower. Faster growing nails is almost proof that the patient has RSD/CRPS. RSD/CRPS is associated with a variety of skin disorders including rashes, ulcers and pustules. ⁹ Although extremely rare, some patients have required amputation of an extremity due to life-threatening reoccurring infections of the skin. Abnormal sympathetic (vasomotor changes) activity may be associated with skin that is either warm or cold to touch. The patient may perceive sensations of warmth or coolness in the affected limb without even touching it (vasomotor changes). The skin may show increased sweating (sudomotor changes) or increased chilling of the skin with goose flesh (pilomotor changes). Changes in skin color can range from a white mottled appearance to a red or blue appearance. Changes in skin color (and pain) can be triggered by changes in the room temperature, especially cold environments. However, many of these changes occur without any apparent provocation. Patients describe their disease as though it had a mind of its own.
   
3. Swelling - pitting or hard (brawny) edema is usually diffuse and localized to the painful and tender region. If the edema is sharply demarcated on the surface of the skin along a line, it is almost proof that the patient has RSD/CRPS. However, some patients will show a sharply demarcated edema because they tie a band around the extremity for comfort. Therefore, one has to be certain that the sharply demarcated edema is not due to a previously wrapped bandage around the extremity.
   
4. Movement Disorder - Patients with RSD/CRPS have difficulty moving because they hurt when they move. In addition, there seems to be a direct inhibitory effect of RSD/CRPS on muscle contraction. Patients describe difficulty in initiating movement, as though they have "stiff" joints. This phenomena of stiffness is most noticeable to some patients after a sympathetic nerve block when the stiffness may disappear. Decreased mobilization of extremities can lead to wasting of muscles (disuse atrophy). Some patients have little pain due to RSD/CRPS but instead they have a great deal of stiffness and difficulty initiating movement.⁷ Tremors and involuntary severe jerking of extremities may be present. Psychological stress may exacerbate these symptoms. Sudden onset of muscle cramps (spasms) can be severe and completely incapacitating. Some patients describe a slow "drawing up of muscles" in the extremity due to increased muscle tone leaving the hand-fingers or foot-toes in a fixed position (dystonia). Patients with such seemly bizarre movements might be inaccurately diagnosed with a psychogenic movement disorder. Additionally, the fact that quite extreme behavioral changes often follow rather trivial injuries in patients with RSD/CRPS, this observation might contribute to the perception that the patient suffers from a psychogenic disorder as well.
   
   Specific diagnostic criteria have been established for the diagnosis of psychogenic movement disorders in cases involving RSD/CRPS. ¹⁰ Unfortunately, physicians sometimes fail to follow these diagnostic guidelines and carelessly report a "psychogenic" disorder. ¹¹ This misdiagnosis can be devastating to the patient and can lead to delaying urgent medical care.
   
   A clinical test sometimes used to demonstrate that a patient is faking muscle weakness is called "give away weakness". This test is NOT a reliable indicator of a psychogenic movement disorder. Patients with RSD/CRPS will give away when a force is applied to their extremity because of pain. Also, because patients with RSD/CRPS have difficulty sustaining muscle contraction, they will give away as well.
   
5. Spreading Symptoms
   
   
   1. A "continuity type" of spread where the symptoms spread upward from the initial site, e.g. from the hand to the shoulder.
   2. A "mirror-image type" where the spread was to the opposite limb.
   3. An "independent type" where symptoms spread to a separate, distant region of the body. This type of spread may be related to a second trauma.
   
   - Initially, RSD/CRPS symptoms are generally localized to the site of injury. As time progresses, the pain and symptoms tend to become more diffuse. Typically, the disorder starts in an extremity. However, the pain may occur in the trunk or side of the face. On the other hand, the disorder may start in the distal extremity and spread to the trunk and face. At this stage of the disorder, an entire quadrant of the body may be involved. Maleki et. al. recently described three patterns of spreading symptoms in RSD/CRPS: ¹²
6. Bone changes – X-rays may show wasting of bone (patchy osteoporosis) or a bone scan may show increased or decreased uptake of a certain radioactive substance (technecium 99m) in bones after intravenous injection.
   


7. Duration of RSD/CRPS – The duration of RSD/CRPS varies, in mild cases it may last for weeks followed by remission; in many cases the pain continues for years and in some cases, indefinitely. Some patients experience periods of remission and exacerbation. Periods of remission may last for weeks, months, or years.


Stages of RSD/CRPS:

The staging of RSD/CRPS is a concept that is dying. The course of the disease seems to be so unpredictable between various patients that staging is not helpful in the treatment of RSD/CRPS. Not all of the clinical features listed below for the various stages of RSD/CRPS may be present. The speed of progression varies greatly in different individuals. Stage I and II symptoms begin to appear within a year. Some patients do not progress to Stage III. Furthermore, some of the early symptoms (Stage I and II) may fade as the disease progresses to Stage III. The following stages are presented in these guidelines merely for historical significance.



STAGE I

1. Onset of severe, pain limited to the site of injury
   
2. Increased sensitivity of skin to touch and light pressure (hyperasthesia).
   
3. Localized swelling
   
4. Muscle cramps
   
5. Stiffness and limited mobility
   
6. At onset, skin is usually warm, red and dry and then it may change to a blue (cyanotic) in appearance and become cold and sweaty.
   
7. Increased sweating (hyperhydrosis).
   
8. In mild cases this stage lasts a few weeks, then subsides spontaneously or responds rapidly to treatment.

STAGE II

1. Pain becomes even more severe and more diffuse
   

Swelling tends to spread and it may change from a soft to hard (brawny) type



Hair may become coarse then scant, nails may grow faster then grow slower and become brittle, cracked and heavily grooved


Spotty wasting of bone (osteoporosis) occurs early but may become severe and diffuse


Muscle wasting begins

STAGE III


1. Marked wasting of tissue (atrophic) eventually become irreversible.
   
2. For many patients the pain becomes intractable and may involve the entire limb.
   
3. A small percentage of patients have developed generalized RSD affecting the entire body

life unkind

Well My grand daughter's birthday was May 29th she turned 6 years old, we were having a party for her today June 2nd as the weekend before was memeorial day weeknd and thought it wasn't a good time. I bought invitations filled them out and took them to school she handed each I went one out ot each of her 18 classmates. We got 6 rsvps from parents. So I went out and bought party plates, napkins, a banner, 2 table cloths, cups, hugs juices, freeze pops, and ice cream cups had a beautiful barbie fairy cake made, and ordered pizzas. we had it at a park that she loves. Took all the supplies out there hung up the banner, taped the table cloths on, laid evrythign out nice but the candles on the cake, then waited, and waited, and waited and not one child showed up. I was so disappointed, because I knew she was going to be disappointed. Finally at 1:45, 45 minutes after the party was suppose to start we packed everythign up put it all back into the car and went to my mother's house to have the party there. (it was a very windy day and everything was blowing all over) so it was myself, my grand daughter, my daughter, my son. my mother and step dad she had a good time and got some awesome gifts from us but my mother and I did alot of work in getting the party together and spent a good chuck of change to have no one show up. I also hurt alot since I had to help load and unload cars and walk a little ways to get to the tables at the park but I wanted to make her happy, so now I just hurt.
Makayla mentioned it a couple times she was upset no one showed up but the 2 people that made her the most sad was her so called grandpa and my daughter's boyfriend. She loves them both so much and they just walked out of her life like they had never met her. makes me very sad for her. I never expected either of them to show up my ex the one she calls grandpa knew there was a party but was never invited, my daughter's boyfriend was told about the party several times and his excuse was he forgot.
I can not figure out why they disappoint her so often. I think she is getting used to her grandpa not comming around she hasn't seen him since January. My daughter's boyfriend used to come over alot, holidays birthdays, and every saturday take her and my daughter out and she was so excited when he showed up but he just stopped for some reason. I guess she is beginning to learn sadley at a young age that men can disappoint.
I am also very worried about money, I get a little disability from work, and I get a little child support for being guardian to my grand daughter but that isn't always dependable. I don't always get the same amount and sometimes I go without any at all some weeks. I applied for SSD and got turned down but I hear everyone does the first time. So I have just retained a attorney to help fight my appeal. I have a little stash money I use every month to pay my bills but what do I do when that runs out? It often weighs on my mind and stresses me out a little.
I also need a new vehicle the one I have now is old and seems there is a new different noise on it every week it can not be driven out of the town I live in as I don't want to drive it far just in case. It has been good so far but one one day it is going to quit, I have enough to pay cash for one but then what would I do for  my monthly bills? so I just keep the van I have and hope it last until I come into some money.
ok well everyone keep safe love ya's!

More on my RSD

I am so sorry if I have repeated myself  on here, I am new to blogging and sometimes forget what I have written previous.
My mother took me out to lunch today, we went to Petsmart just walked from the car(mom dropped me off in front on the door) into the store up 3 isles. went to the bank stood in line for about 5 mins walked back to the car, went to the dollar store got dropped off in front of the door, just got a box of baggies, pack of hair ties, and a father's day card, then came home my hip is hurtign me REAL bad. I took a pain pill and it just isn't doing anything. I am now sitting on 2 pillows to write this and it helping at all. I guess I am just not going to be able to go out anywhere anymore, because it just makes my pain so much worse.
 I have applied for a appeal on my social security disability that I was denied w I am hoping to get the book I filled out mailed to the lawyer tomorrow I just have to have a paper copied and I don't have a printer. I really need to get a printer.
I have been having alot of swelling in my ankles, toes and fingers mostley at night it is a symptom of RSD as well as a side effect of the medicne I take. My toes and ankles do not have pain but my fingers and hands have alot pain, sometimes if I pick something up I drop it they are especially bad in the mornings.
I have just been reading up on treatments for RSD on the simulator, and it says a pain pump is very effective I am allergic to so many medicines that a pain pump will deliver it it in smaller doeses over the course of a 24 hour period that people can tolerate the medicine more. I am making a appt tomorrow to see a different pain Dr. to get his opinion on both. I like the sound of the pain pump much better but we will see.
more to come
God Bless!

just some thoughts

Well I finished my last day of therapy last thursday It has helped that my right hip doesn't feel so tight, but it hasn't helped my pain at all. I sit up sometimes late( as I did last night till 4am) just playing rummy on the computer, working on cross stitch, and watchign tv. Not much to do that late at night my house is so small that you hear every little thing. I still don't do much during the day as, my pain still is so bad.
I went to the pain Dr he wants me to get a spine stimulator I'm not sure I hurt so bad one day I called his office to get pain meds and he won't give me any as he is sett on this stimulator so I just have to suffer. Not right as he is a pain Dr. So I am going to see another one soon and I will update.
My daughter takes the clothes down to the basement for me a couple days a week I do down there and do the laundry, I wash dishes, I make dinner, but my daughter takes trash out, vaccuums etc. I don't like much going grocery shopping I used to love it but Ihave to ride a cart in the store my daughter goes to put the itmes on the cart for me which means my grand daughter has to go and it's just seems too much for 3 of us to take up isle space and be in others way, so most times her and my grand daughter go off a list I give her. I do need to "get out" once in a while so I go to wal mart.
We planted flowers over the weekend. Oh I should say my daughter planted them while I supervised LOL. I did pull a few weeds, and i put the soil and flowers in all my pots. I do have to say we did a good job and the front yard looks awesome.
My grand duaghter helps us water the plants every night. she really likes doing it. I am tryign to teach her there is more than just watching tv. she has been picking up her room, and feeding our dog after school. I found her a treehouse looking playhouse for the back yard, she just loves it, the same day someone gave us a big outside kitchen, and we put up her pool. It isn't as big as the one we had for her last year but she loves it. I have this big backyard might as well take advantage of the space and give her a reason to want to go outside. so now she has a playhouse, kitchen, sandbox, and a pool put back she has been wanting to go out the last few days.
My mother colored my hair on saturday she isn't big on gray she tried a different color instead of medium brown like normal she decided red/brown was better it is really red. I don't like it very much but it won't last forever and I can change the color back.
I wish I could speak of some summer vacation plans but I can't, I can not afford to go anywhere. I am off work, and my grand duaghter's last day of school is June 15th would be a perfect time to go but I just can't fit it into the budget. The last 3 years we have went to Houghton Lake my ex in laws have a mobile home , a boat, a golf cart. The only thing it cost me is gas money there and back, and some food. We always had a great time and I wish we could go again my grand daughter really wants to go but it isn't to be.
My ex husband and I have been on good terms so we go up north have a vacation and he and my grand daughter can see each other, but since April he had decided that he doesn't want to speak to me anymore. I do not know why, he was driving his parents back from Florida and we were speaking fine He was comming here was going to spend a couple weeks then back to his parents and so on so he and my grand daughter could spend time together. No matter how he ever treated me he treated her like a princess. She hasn't seen him since the first week of January she asks for him, can he come see her, cna she call him I have to be the bad guy and say no. She is really hurting right now I wish I could take it away but I can't. My ex decided he wanted to come down for a day or 2 and see her then leave but, that just makes it worse for her she is really devastated when he leaves after such a short time. That is why we came up with the 2 weeks here and 2 weeks at his parents, but for soem reason he changed it I ask him over and over why he changed it, why he doesn't want to see his grand daughter but I can't get any answer.
I am hoping as the days, months, and years go by she forgets about him and doesn't have to be hurt everytime she thinks of him. I have tried to take pictures of him out of the house, and anythign of hers that remind her of him so she isn't sad. Once in awhile she finds somehting that is a reminder but then we just deal with it. I am hoping my ex realizes one day how he hurt her, how sad he has made her I don't think he will he out for himself but one can hope.
well closing for now everyone have a great week
God bless!

hurting

Happy Tuesday everyone I hope everyone is having a awesome week so far. Yesterday my daughter planted the flowers in my front yard for me I supervised LOL, I did pull a few weeds though, and we rearranged the sandstone it looks really good! Today I planted a pink geranium in a terra cotta pot have 3 more pots to do for the backyard but I ran out of soil so it's off tomorrow to get some more and finish the remaining flowers.
I went to the Orthopedic Dr last monday he said there is nothing else surgically he can do for me, but he is going to continue to see me every 3 months so I can keep receiving my work disability. He gave me a perscription for a walker because when both my hips hurt I can't use my cane. I got the walker, but haven't used it yet if I hurt this bad tomorrow I will be using it.
 I went to the pain Dr on wednesday since I am still having so much pain and allergic to so many pain medicines he suggested I get a pain stimulator in my spine, the thought of that scares me. Not sure if I want anyone poking around on my spine. I have a video I am suppose to watch about it, I really need to get to that. If i decide it's for me I have to see a pain psychologist and take a 500 question questionaire to make sure I am not to depressed or suicidal if so I can't have the procedure done. I guarentee I am neither. I am thinking that I would rather just have some pain medicine I can take during the day and just live the way I am.
I had physical therapy today, I only have one session left then I am done. One exersice I thought I was gonna have a stroke when I started it it hurt SO bad I let out a yelp and the therapist decided it was too much for me. It is mainly my hip I didn't have the surgery on that is hurting me so bad, It is just about as bad as the other one. I am dreading going on thursday but I will.
I know that tonight I will not be going to bed probabley at all I just hurt too bad to lay down, laying is the worst on my hips, so I thought it was a good time to write this blog and work on another cross stitch. I have 2 finished I will posting pics of.
I decided my grand daughter and I need to eat a little healthier so my daughter went to the store and bought apples, pears, peaches, bananas, broccoli and I have carotts, I am going to cut them all up into baggies so we can just grab one when we need a snack going to lay off the junk food for awhile. It is bad becase with my hip and leg pain I can't exersice and my grand daughter's feet always hurt (clubbed feet, 4 surgeries, braces, casts) but lately they have been hurting more than usual. She went to a birthday party this evening at a park and she was crying when she got home that they hurt so bad. I have noticed that her right foot is turned in a little more than usual, we have not been real fathful about her wearing her braces she is suppose to wear at night. Starting tomorrow we are going to get back into the habit of her wearing them every night all night.  So she doesn't get much exersice either.
Well I am going to close with a pic of one of my finished cross stitches and the front yard. (well one side of the front yard)  Hope you enjoy them.

God Bless!

Happy Sunday!! You know I follow alot of blogs most of them are craft and designing blogs, diy blogs they have alot of followers and alot of comments on them. I know people love to look at before and after pictures of beautiful furniture, pillows, and room makeovers, I know I do that is why I follow them. I guess I need to figure out what attracts them to blogs in the first place, so I can get more people attracted to mine. I thought that writing about domestic violence and RSD and projects would be good things to attract people but so far no.
I do not have alot of information on RSD because I have been newly diagnosed, I know that I sit up in a chair in my living room most nights until 4am because my legs and feet go numb and tingle so bad it feels like I have ants crawling all over them. It is worsened when I lay down for some reason. Then I never sleep more than 4 hours which is good for me, usually about 3 hours a night is average. Sometimes the lack of sleep is very hard on me. I try to do what housework I can, I go to therapy twice a week I have Dr appointments and usually after doing these things my legs and hips are the worst.
I am going to try and find more information on RSD and post it on here. I think it will be good for people to understand it.
I still haven't done the step stool project it has been so cold here in Michigan even a freeze warning last night, it is hard to get the ambition to go outside when it 30 degrees to sparay paint and do projects, hoping it will warm up some soon so I can get it done. It won't take but about 3 hours total.
I talk alot about domestic violence I would have really never thought about it if it wouldn't have happened to me, I have posted before I was never beat up by husband I was never locked in a closet, but there are so many other ways that domestic violence happens I never realized. I thought that beating a woman up was it. I was verbally abused on almost a daily basis, I was pushed, I was told to shut up, I got yelled at when I was 20 minutes late comming home from a outing with my mother, I had money stolen from me. I felt like if I didn't do what he wanted I was a bad person. If my opinion on anything was different than his he got mad. I never knew if we were going to argue, if he was going to drink until he was drunk and push me, and most people say when you are pushed and demaeaned verbally it can escalate to other things. 
I heard  one of my step sons tell me through a story he wrote how his dad used to abuse his mother, how he was smacked by him, So I was always walking on egg shells. I still love him I think I always will. He was very good to my grand daughter and she loves him very much. I know it hurt her when I left him because she couldn't see him everyday, couldn't  takes walks with him, can't go to the beach with him, but I think not having people screaming at each other day is a better way to live. I let him come and visit her whenever and he has many times, but for reason since Jan of this year he hasn't come down to see her, I have asked him to, I have even asked him to reconsile. He says he still loves us. I love him, I realize that is a bad thing. I so think when I see him or talk to him sometimes he has changed, he talks so nice to me, then other times like lately he has for some reason talked very mean to me, hasn't come down to see my grand duaghter whom he claims to love very much, he tells me to kiss his a**, and f**k off that is no way to talk to someone you claim to love. So as much as it pains me I need to finally make the break, I have shut his phone off which was on my account( he hasn't paid it since December and besides the fact a person such as he doesn't need to be on my account, why should I pay the bill evry month?) I have unfriended him on facebook I just think with his attitude being what it is still and when we chat on the computer I never know when I will say something to make him mad then he calls me names or ignores me for days. I just don't want to go through again what I did for 9 years. I think the real reason he doesn't want to reconsile is because when his rich aunt and parents die he will inherit a pretty good amount of money, they don't like me anymore becase they are old fashion when you marry you marry forever even if he is abusing you you are suppose to stand by your man. When I left and he had to go live with them and I divorced him that was the ultimate sin. He would be out of the will if he came back to me and he doesn't want to risk it. So just another reason to realize he isn't the kind of man I want to be with, But he is hurting my grand daughter by all of a sudden not comming to see her she misses him terribley It has been almost 4 months since she has seen him for the first 2 months she asked for him almost evryday I would say he is in florida with his parents (had to take them for a month no other family member would so in order to please his parents he had to druve them to florida and stay)he will be back soon to see you. Things remind her of him. a way he used to put her shirts on(arms first) a beer commerical (grandpa likes to drink beer) a toy he bought her, she would cry saying she wants grandpa why did he have to leave. I would feel really bad for her. The 3rd month she would ask for him about once a week I would say he is still in Florida. This month hasn't been so bad I think she only mentioned him twice. I think even though she is 5 she is realizing that he is just gone. If she does ask again I will tell her truth that he is back in Michigan and I don't know why he hasn't come down to see her. I refuse to lie to her. I am hoping she forgets about him I think it will be better that way, and as much as it hurt me I have to let him go also, I have to get it out of my heart and into my brian that he just isn't going to change he has been this way forever and it's the way it is going to be.
On a brighter note I will post a pic as soon as I get the step stool done, and if we get a nice day soon I have a swing bench to snad and paint and distress I will post before and after's of that too.
I hope evryone has a happy sunday!!
More to come

Flustered

Well I went to the ortho Dr. monday he says there isn't anything more he can do for me the removal of my bursa was the last resort. We talked about my pain, my left hip is getting bad just like the right he ordered me a walker I said I am only going to use it when both my hips hurt so bad I can hardley walk. I currently use a cane.
He also ordered 4 more weeks of therapy, I went yesterday (tuesday) my hips weren't hurtingt too bad so I was able to do everything. On sunday and monday they hurt so bad it was all I could do to make it throught the days.
Therapy assistant said if I don't make anymore progress in the third week there is no sence in going the next 3 weeks they won't be able to justify it.
My problem is with my left hip giving me trouble I have to stand on it and put pressure on it to do the exersices on my right and sometimes I am just not able to because of pain.
I have a appointment with the pain Dr on the 2nd I am hoping I can get pain meds,
we will see.
I still never got the step stool painted I am hoping to do that today hoping it isn't so cold out have to do it outside. I will post a pic when done.   
I did finish a cross stitch I have it listed in my etsy store. http://www.brendavr.etsy.com/
well it is 3:23am hope everyone has a great day going to try the bed out.

more to come

This and That

Well it's 1am on saturday morning I had a somewhat eventful friday for me anyways. My mother and I went to a rummage sale at a nearby church, their prices were very low I ended up spending a whole 3.25 I bought my grand daughter 2 barbie dolls, 2 school church in excellent condiiton for the next school year, a wicker lid, and a awesome throw rug. I thought these were great deals, We made a kmart stop for bath cleaner, a bucket, and a mop. Once home I washed beds sheets and remade beds,(with the help of my daughter) finished my son's laundry, swept the floors and cleaned the bathroom. I am hoping to get a step stool painted tomorrow so sunday I can get the fairies painted on it. Next week hoping to get a bench sanded and painted so I can list if for sale. I also have 2 finished stitch I am hoping to get onto backing tomorrow so I can get them listed on etsy. http://www.brendavr.etsy.com/ 
 My hips and legs hurt very badley right now which is why I am still up and suspect I will up a long while yet. The pain pills I have are just not strong enough to take away any pain. My legs and feet are tingling and numb so thats another problem.
I had my last day of therapy yesterday my therapist is recommending that I have more because I have not met my goals for stairs, pain or strength, I have a appointment with my Ortho Dr on monday I will see what he says.
Then on May 2nd I have a appointment with the pain Dr. I am telling him no more injections in any part of my body as I have had many of them with no results. I am hoping to get a pain patch to get me through the day and sleepless nights, I am jsut so tired all the time from lack of sleep. I am pretty sure I agree with the RSD diagnosis from the pain Dr. not 100% but almost I have almost all the systoms. We will see what he says.
I finshed my lighthouse table runner today just have to wash and press it. I decided instead of selliong it I am giving as a gift to my ex mother in law from my grand daughter she has a birthday comming up. She collects lighthouse stuff has a ton.
Still deciding what to do for my grand daughters birthday which is late May, We have a small pool, sandbox, and a couple toys but not really enough for kids to do. So I thoguht maybee at a waterpark but the nearest one is 25 mins away not sure if parents want to drive 5 and 6 year olds for a party. I will figure out something.
Please remember April is child abuse awarness month. If anyoen suspects neglect, or abuse of a child please report it it will not be a one time occurance, it will continue until someone stops it you could be that person.
I have posted pics of the awesome $1.00 throw rug I got and of the finished table ruuner. Already started another cross stitch.
more to come