Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Flustered

well I am doing physical therapy for my hip bursitis and man it is hard! I have days that I can't do anything but the last 4 days have been really good.my pain has been minimal, vry happy about that. Ihave been off worki since July 18th disability has been fooling around since that time wanting more and more information to delay paying me has been really hard paying the bills but I am surviving. If I don't hear soemthing soon I am just going to have to go to back to work ealier than the Dr would like me to. Not the end of the world.
My son has noved into his own apartmet in a disabled high rise he seems to be doing good, and he likes it. it is alot quietier here, my daughter moved into his space inthe basement, to spend more time with her daughter. That is a challenge to though as she is bi polar and has severe ADHD, But I luckily know how to handle it.
I am so glad to be done with the abuse I suffered at the hand of my ex-husband. I am so used to his drama that osmetimes I don't know what to do with the quiet but I so like it more than being abused.
I finally got rid of him for good a couple of days ago. Not htat we were together but I took his cell phone off my account that way I have no connection to him. I hope IF and when I find someone who looves for me I pick a better kind of person, not sure what attracted me I did not know about his felonies, or abuse until a little while into our relationship, if I would have known I might have made a better decision.
He got into a lot of trouble while we were together a hit and run with my new van then deyign he did, breaking parloe, domestic violence twice, driving with a suspended license twice I always had tickets parole fees, and court fines to pay for him becase he didn't work. When I think back there were signs but I ignored them, he would yell at me or say things to me that weren't nice make me cry, but he would say he was sorry and I would forget baout it. About a year into our marriage it started getting worse in a verbal way and then he would never sya he was sorry becase if I wouldn't have opend my mouth it wouldn't have happened. in 05 was the first time I remmeber it getting physical we were arguing and he pushed me up against the wall very hard I so wanted to call the police but thought better of it, I should have left him then but was too afraif og being alone. So I stayed. I thnak God that it nevr got more than a push alot of women get the hell beat out them he was never that bad. but a push up against a wall and a kitchen counter was bad enough.
more to come.
God bless you!

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