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Wednesday, May 23, 2012

More on my RSD

I am so sorry if I have repeated myself  on here, I am new to blogging and sometimes forget what I have written previous.
My mother took me out to lunch today, we went to Petsmart just walked from the car(mom dropped me off in front on the door) into the store up 3 isles. went to the bank stood in line for about 5 mins walked back to the car, went to the dollar store got dropped off in front of the door, just got a box of baggies, pack of hair ties, and a father's day card, then came home my hip is hurtign me REAL bad. I took a pain pill and it just isn't doing anything. I am now sitting on 2 pillows to write this and it helping at all. I guess I am just not going to be able to go out anywhere anymore, because it just makes my pain so much worse.
 I have applied for a appeal on my social security disability that I was denied w I am hoping to get the book I filled out mailed to the lawyer tomorrow I just have to have a paper copied and I don't have a printer. I really need to get a printer.
I have been having alot of swelling in my ankles, toes and fingers mostley at night it is a symptom of RSD as well as a side effect of the medicne I take. My toes and ankles do not have pain but my fingers and hands have alot pain, sometimes if I pick something up I drop it they are especially bad in the mornings.
I have just been reading up on treatments for RSD on the simulator, and it says a pain pump is very effective I am allergic to so many medicines that a pain pump will deliver it it in smaller doeses over the course of a 24 hour period that people can tolerate the medicine more. I am making a appt tomorrow to see a different pain Dr. to get his opinion on both. I like the sound of the pain pump much better but we will see.
more to come
God Bless!



Tuesday, May 22, 2012

just some thoughts

Well I finished my last day of therapy last thursday It has helped that my right hip doesn't feel so tight, but it hasn't helped my pain at all. I sit up sometimes late( as I did last night till 4am) just playing rummy on the computer, working on cross stitch, and watchign tv. Not much to do that late at night my house is so small that you hear every little thing. I still don't do much during the day as, my pain still is so bad.
I went to the pain Dr he wants me to get a spine stimulator I'm not sure I hurt so bad one day I called his office to get pain meds and he won't give me any as he is sett on this stimulator so I just have to suffer. Not right as he is a pain Dr. So I am going to see another one soon and I will update.
My daughter takes the clothes down to the basement for me a couple days a week I do down there and do the laundry, I wash dishes, I make dinner, but my daughter takes trash out, vaccuums etc. I don't like much going grocery shopping I used to love it but Ihave to ride a cart in the store my daughter goes to put the itmes on the cart for me which means my grand daughter has to go and it's just seems too much for 3 of us to take up isle space and be in others way, so most times her and my grand daughter go off a list I give her. I do need to "get out" once in a while so I go to wal mart.
We planted flowers over the weekend. Oh I should say my daughter planted them while I supervised LOL. I did pull a few weeds, and i put the soil and flowers in all my pots. I do have to say we did a good job and the front yard looks awesome.
My grand duaghter helps us water the plants every night. she really likes doing it. I am tryign to teach her there is more than just watching tv. she has been picking up her room, and feeding our dog after school. I found her a treehouse looking playhouse for the back yard, she just loves it, the same day someone gave us a big outside kitchen, and we put up her pool. It isn't as big as the one we had for her last year but she loves it. I have this big backyard might as well take advantage of the space and give her a reason to want to go outside. so now she has a playhouse, kitchen, sandbox, and a pool put back she has been wanting to go out the last few days.
My mother colored my hair on saturday she isn't big on gray she tried a different color instead of medium brown like normal she decided red/brown was better it is really red. I don't like it very much but it won't last forever and I can change the color back.
I wish I could speak of some summer vacation plans but I can't, I can not afford to go anywhere. I am off work, and my grand duaghter's last day of school is June 15th would be a perfect time to go but I just can't fit it into the budget. The last 3 years we have went to Houghton Lake my ex in laws have a mobile home , a boat, a golf cart. The only thing it cost me is gas money there and back, and some food. We always had a great time and I wish we could go again my grand daughter really wants to go but it isn't to be.
My ex husband and I have been on good terms so we go up north have a vacation and he and my grand daughter can see each other, but since April he had decided that he doesn't want to speak to me anymore. I do not know why, he was driving his parents back from Florida and we were speaking fine He was comming here was going to spend a couple weeks then back to his parents and so on so he and my grand daughter could spend time together. No matter how he ever treated me he treated her like a princess. She hasn't seen him since the first week of January she asks for him, can he come see her, cna she call him I have to be the bad guy and say no. She is really hurting right now I wish I could take it away but I can't. My ex decided he wanted to come down for a day or 2 and see her then leave but, that just makes it worse for her she is really devastated when he leaves after such a short time. That is why we came up with the 2 weeks here and 2 weeks at his parents, but for soem reason he changed it I ask him over and over why he changed it, why he doesn't want to see his grand daughter but I can't get any answer.
I am hoping as the days, months, and years go by she forgets about him and doesn't have to be hurt everytime she thinks of him. I have tried to take pictures of him out of the house, and anythign of hers that remind her of him so she isn't sad. Once in awhile she finds somehting that is a reminder but then we just deal with it. I am hoping my ex realizes one day how he hurt her, how sad he has made her I don't think he will he out for himself but one can hope.
well closing for now everyone have a great week
God bless!

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

hurting

Happy Tuesday everyone I hope everyone is having a awesome week so far. Yesterday my daughter planted the flowers in my front yard for me I supervised LOL, I did pull a few weeds though, and we rearranged the sandstone it looks really good! Today I planted a pink geranium in a terra cotta pot have 3 more pots to do for the backyard but I ran out of soil so it's off tomorrow to get some more and finish the remaining flowers.
I went to the Orthopedic Dr last monday he said there is nothing else surgically he can do for me, but he is going to continue to see me every 3 months so I can keep receiving my work disability. He gave me a perscription for a walker because when both my hips hurt I can't use my cane. I got the walker, but haven't used it yet if I hurt this bad tomorrow I will be using it.
 I went to the pain Dr on wednesday since I am still having so much pain and allergic to so many pain medicines he suggested I get a pain stimulator in my spine, the thought of that scares me. Not sure if I want anyone poking around on my spine. I have a video I am suppose to watch about it, I really need to get to that. If i decide it's for me I have to see a pain psychologist and take a 500 question questionaire to make sure I am not to depressed or suicidal if so I can't have the procedure done. I guarentee I am neither. I am thinking that I would rather just have some pain medicine I can take during the day and just live the way I am.
I had physical therapy today, I only have one session left then I am done. One exersice I thought I was gonna have a stroke when I started it it hurt SO bad I let out a yelp and the therapist decided it was too much for me. It is mainly my hip I didn't have the surgery on that is hurting me so bad, It is just about as bad as the other one. I am dreading going on thursday but I will.
I know that tonight I will not be going to bed probabley at all I just hurt too bad to lay down, laying is the worst on my hips, so I thought it was a good time to write this blog and work on another cross stitch. I have 2 finished I will posting pics of.
I decided my grand daughter and I need to eat a little healthier so my daughter went to the store and bought apples, pears, peaches, bananas, broccoli and I have carotts, I am going to cut them all up into baggies so we can just grab one when we need a snack going to lay off the junk food for awhile. It is bad becase with my hip and leg pain I can't exersice and my grand daughter's feet always hurt (clubbed feet, 4 surgeries, braces, casts) but lately they have been hurting more than usual. She went to a birthday party this evening at a park and she was crying when she got home that they hurt so bad. I have noticed that her right foot is turned in a little more than usual, we have not been real fathful about her wearing her braces she is suppose to wear at night. Starting tomorrow we are going to get back into the habit of her wearing them every night all night.  So she doesn't get much exersice either.
Well I am going to close with a pic of one of my finished cross stitches and the front yard. (well one side of the front yard)  Hope you enjoy them.

God Bless!